The blonde marshmallow

Many people have interesting birth stories to share, me included. One day I will share my amazing birth stories, but for now, my amazing “How I found out we were pregnant story”… This time of year makes me think of early spring of 2004, when we found out little Em was on his way into our lives.

D and I own a small graphic/web design company. Every year business slows down after Thanksgiving until the start of January when everyone realizes all at once, that it’s time to get back on the ball. January of 2004, like many others rendered us knee deep in projects, a happy place to be. This is also when I decided it would be good to start investigating pre-schools for my tiny At-man.

All I can actually remember about this time is feeling a bit on the sleepy side, but no more than anyone in my position would be. It wasn’t until the end of March when it hit me like a freight train. I went to get dressed that morning and had a hard time with my pants button. Hmmm…I haven’t been eating anything out of the ordinary, ran my usual schedule. Must be bloat. But was it the time for bloat? When the hell was my last period anyway? I shuffled the thought to the back of my mind and headed to the office, but by my afternoon coffee run I still couldn’t get it out of my head. I ducked into the pharmacy and grabbed a pregnancy test just to set my mind as ease.

From the pharmacy, I ran to the coffee shop for our office latte fix, but my nerves got the better of me as I rushed into the ladies room. Holy S–T! There was the pink line! When did it happen? I know some people have their doubts even today, but I SWEAR I had no idea. My mind raced but I couldn’t imagine how far along I was. With At-man I knew the next day so it was a pretty major surprise that this one slipped by me.

D sensed something was up right away. I didn’t even know where to start but he was about as happy as he could be, even through the shock. When I called the doctor to set up the first prenatal check I explained the situation so they got me an ultrasound right away. At-man, D and I showed up for the appointment with a mix of excitement and at least on my part, fear. Had I drank too many glasses of wine? Did I remember to take my vitamins? When did this happen anyway? With At-man I had an early ultrasound so I was surprised when she went right for my tummy. “How will you see it that way?” I asked? “We start this way and if we can’t get anything we will re-group.” She laid the wand on my greased up stomach and there he was on the screen. A perfect little baby, according to the monitor, nearly 16 weeks along.

If you ever have the chance to be in total and complete denial of a pregnancy, I highly recommend it. With At-man the entire first trimester turned me into a basket case. With Em, I was oblivious until the deal was set in stone. Thank god he was the second and also a boy, the lag in preparation wasn’t too bad since we already had everything we needed. The crib was still set up! Everything I was oblivious to for the past 4 months well, it all simply fell into place.

I like to look back to pictures of our little family of soon to be four, pictures of when Em was there but we didn’t yet know it. I think about how he was actually with us that Christmas, that day at the playground. The best I can figure, he was the result of the only big Christmas party we had time to attend that year. Thank god we went! In retorspect, I can’t imagine life without him. My soft, little blond marshmallow.